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Profitable Misery
How Silicon Valley turned isolation into a business model, and what we can do about it
Matt Johansen
December 13, 2024
Quick stats to ruin your day:
Welcome to the Loneliness Economy, where your isolation is someone else's quarterly earnings.
Here's the thing about loneliness - it's really fucking profitable. Just ask the VCs pouring billions into AI therapists, digital girlfriends, and algorithm-driven dopamine dealers. We've created a perfect storm where technology simultaneously isolates people and sells them the cure for isolation.
Last week, I watched a video demo of an AI mental health app. "It really gets me," the testimonial said about an algorithm trained on Reddit posts and Twitter threads.
The same week, I talked to a guy who had spent over $25K on sports betting apps because the algorithms knew exactly when to push his buttons. Different products, same business model: monetize the void.
The Math:
Isolation + Algorithms + Capital = Profitable Misery
The tech industry, our industry, has mastered the art of turning loneliness into monthly recurring revenue. We're building nicotine for the soul, and business is booming.
The New Addiction Stack:
AI Companions for emotional needs
Sports betting for excitement
Social media for validation
Digital therapy for guilt
Mail-order stimulants for focus
Dating apps for hope
Porn for the rest
Each one perfectly optimized to keep you coming back, each one collecting data to better predict your breaking point.
Speaking of data – let's talk about the privacy nightmare you're sleeping through. That AI therapy app you're using? It knows more about your mental state than your actual therapist, and its privacy policy is written in what I like to call "data harvesting legalese."
Even if the AI therapist companies are angels and aren’t monetizing your data, we have a history we can point to where this is still a privacy nightmare.
In 2020, a hacker obtained digitized therapy notes after breaking into the databases of Finland's largest psychotherapy company, Vastaamo. He then proceeded to blackmail 33,000 people many of whom’s lives were ruined due to this leak.
And that was just traditional therapy notes. Imagine the damage possible with AI-generated psychological profiles based on thousands of intimate conversations.
The Privacy Pyramid Scheme:
What is currently stopping this future?
Collect intimate mental health data
Train AI on your vulnerabilities
Sell better addiction algorithms
Profit from your deepening isolation
Repeat
We in tech are the canaries in the coal mine. We're the first adopters, the ones who should know better, yet we're falling for it just as hard. Maybe harder.
Why? Because we're:
Chronically online
Prone to isolation
Believers in technical solutions
Burned out enough to try anything
Wealthy enough to afford all the digital band-aids
The really messed up part is we're building these systems. We're the ones writing the code that preys on loneliness, designing the engagement hooks that keep people scrolling at 3 AM, and crafting the privacy policies that nobody reads.
I’m a dad. For a long time I didn’t get the fight against “screen time” - I was a nerdy computer, cartoons, and video game kid. I also played sports and had friends. I made a helluva career out of the tech skills built tinkering on a computer in my room late at night.
BUT the point that I realized that changed my mind; in the ‘90s and ‘00s, my grade school brain wasn’t staring down the barrel of the gun aimed at me by the best and brightest our world has to offer, all focused on keeping my eyeballs on a screen long enough to consume Just One More Ad™️.
I barely stand a chance against these addiction algorithms as a full-grown adult who knows how they work, never mind the kids being spoonfed this stuff out of the womb. That’s a whole other blog post.
The Dopamine Dealers' Playbook:
Create the void (social media isolation)
Sell the solution (digital companions, quick dopa hits via betting or nicotine pouches)
Harvest the data (privacy nightmare)
Optimize the addiction (AI-driven engagement)
Repeat until shareholders rejoice
The truth about addiction – whether it's slots, scrolling, or synthetic serotonin – the house always wins. And in 2024, the house has better algorithms than ever.
Is there hope? (There's always hope in the third act of these posts, right?)
The Resistance Roadmap:
1. Audit Your Digital Dependencies
Delete one addiction app this week
Check your screen time (yeah, it's worse than you think)
Read those privacy policies (I'll wait)
Use screen time limiting and lock out apps (I like Opal because it’s harder to bypass)
Create device-free spaces in your home - rooms where screens simply don't exist
Build in analog days - entire 24-hour periods where you go full 1990s
2. Build Real Connections
Join monthly meetups (yes, actual humans)
Find non-digital hobbies (touching grass is free)
Call someone instead of texting (scary, I know)
Check out something like TimeLeft - randomly matches you up with people for dinners in groups of 5.
Find your 'keystone connections' - the 2-3 people you commit to maintaining real, non-digital relationships with
3. Protect Your Mental Health Data
Use privacy-focused alternatives
Opt out of "anonymous" data collection
Assume everything you tell an AI will be used to train better addiction algorithms
4. Support Others
Check on your "always online" friends
Share resources for real therapy
Call out predatory tech practices
Your loneliness is worth billions to someone. Your mental health data is being weaponized against you. And the tech industry's solution to tech-induced isolation is... more tech.
The opposite of addiction isn't sobriety – it's connection. And no amount of AI, algorithms, or digital dopamine can replace actual human relationships.
Your move.
P.S. Yes, I see the irony of writing about digital addiction in a blog post designed for social sharing. But hey, you play the game you’re in and do the best we can. Share this if it resonated – let's get this conversation started.